And I do. not. get it.
It's just not my thing...I don't get what the fascination is in watching grown men run up and down the field after a ball and jumping on each other. I don't.
But I'm learning. Or at least, I'm trying to learn. There's sort of a curve...
And why, you may ask?
Why try to learn about something that holds absolutely no interest for me?
Because Hubs loves it.
The football season lasts from late August all the way up through February.
That's 7 months out of the year that is devoted to this national obsession and Hubs lives for it. He's counting down the days until the actual season starts, and he's already keeping track of what's going on with the players now (mostly jail time and/or injuries from what I can tell...).
I could spend 7 months pouting, begging, and whining. I could spend time wishing that he'd stop loving it the way that he does and being passive aggressive about it. I could.
Or I could be proactive about my marriage.
My husband loves me more than football. I know that for a fact. But he really, really loves football and sometimes "the mountain has to go to Muhammed." I want to spend more time with my husband all through the year. It's not fair to expect him to just drop what he loves to do so that we can do things that I love to do, or to force him to spend time with me. That's fun for no one, trust me.
I had a little conversation with myself after last season about how I can make things in our home more pleasant and how I can nag less, and the answer came like a thunder clap. Rather than whining and complaining, I could cut to the chase and
ACTUALLY SPEND TIME WITH MY HUSBAND.
Sometimes, I just need to do what HE loves to do, rather than being a child and insisting on constantly having it my way! Now, I know that there are feminists out there who will write me poisoned pen letters because they think that I'm advocating pitching your wants, needs, and interests to the wind and morphing into some cookie cutter Stepford Wife wannabe.
Let me be clear:
What I AM saying is that sometimes we, as women, need to put down the romance novels and step away from the RomComs and meet our husbands halfway. Heaven knows my husband has walked through his fair share of antique festivals and craft stores in his day, so I should be willing to learn something about what he likes, shouldn't I? Isn't it worth it if it means that I get to spend more time with my husband, have actual conversations with him, and make him feel loved and valued in the process?! I know that it makes me feel like a million bucks when he goes out of his way to learn something about one of my interests so that he can buy me a meaningful Christmas present or be able to do something other than let his eyes glaze over when I start to talk about yarn tension and gauge swatches. Now, to me, football is dull as dishwater, but! My husband isn't. My husband is the person that I'm going to be spending forever with, so it matters to me that he feel loved and valued by me, and not just when we're doing something that I want to do.
And look: sometimes I think we need to think to ourselves in our mothers' voices, so I'm going to oversimplify the question here:
This is the choice:
I can either choose to sulk for 7 months every time Hubs reaches for the remote to check the scores on ESPN, thereby wrecking the spirit of my home in the process,
I can choose to be an adult, love my husband the way that Christ has commanded me to (selflessly, patiently, kindly, with a spirit of humility) and thereby get to spend time with him and improve the spirit in the home.
So. I'm slowly, slowly learning about football in bits and pieces, here and there. I'm trying. Like I said, there's sort of a curve to it. lol. It's not easy!
Does your husband have a hobby that he's passionate about? It could be anything- fishing, reading, science, baseball...maybe you're in the same boat as I am when it comes to football! Whatever it is, what can you do to "give [him] somethin' to talk about" with you? Can you imagine the look of delighted surprise when he realizes that you've been taking an interest on the sly and reading up on whatever it is that he's passionate about- just because he likes it?! SO precious! Can you imagine how that will speak to the soft parts of his heart and inspire feelings of love and self-worth?
Share your thoughts with me! What's your hubby's passion and how do you plan to share his interest?